afraid

I’m afraid to fail. And I’m so afraid that I actually fail..only because I’m afraid. Has that ever happened to you?

Heartbreaking.

It’s heartbreaking to think that you know someone and one day that person is hurting you so bad. You just can’t understand the world no more. And even when he’s looking into your eyes and telling you that you were wrong about him…you find it hard to believe it. You can’t believe it’s the truth, because that would mean that you were wrong…and the truth is always hard to accept.

Summer’s Sunset

The sun rays aren’t so powerfull anymore…something’s happening. The colors change. From golden to rusted, from green to yellow. Leafs are falling. Is it because school has started?…There’s a feeling of sadness in the air. As if you can feel the Earth’s pain for lossing it’s beauty. Now I know what’s wrong…it’s autumn!

I kind of get depressed only when I think of those late October and Novermber days, when it’s raining. Even the colors are faded away by then. You get to live in a black&white world. I just hope for a white winter. Only then…I can say that it’s worth to go through autumn.

 

Although, if I think about it…fall is a good change for everyone to think of the past months, what were your plans at the beginning of the year and wat have you accomplished until now, are you satisfied with yourself, have you changed, do you have any regrets…stuff like that. I think my plan were to pass all my exams and I did ( yey!!! ), to get out of my mind and HEART somene and I did ( yey again ). My summer wasn’t as I planned, I just wasted it all of it…this would be my regret but I changed, and a lot. I feel like a different person. I guess just the fact that I’ve lived for most of the time in another city and meeting new people changes you. Any experience leaves some marks on you after all. So if I look back on everything that happened, I smile, with some nostalgia too, but I smile

 

“Fall is here.
Another year
is coming to an end.
Summer’s finished,
Summer’s gone,
Winter’s round the bend.
Fall is piles of crunchy leaves,
orange, gold, and red.
Fall is sweaters with long sleeves
and blankets on the bed.
Fall is footbell,
Fall is pumpkins,
Fall’s where summer ends..”

 

13

13.09.2007 – something changed.

It’s been two years. Happy Anniversary!

You’re my island in the storm.

I need some fresh air.

How wrong is it to hurt someone by telling lies? But only for that person to think bad of you…to not speak to you anymore, to let you live your life. I couldn’t find anyother way. His presence and words are hurting me. I can live without him, but I can’t with him acting like this…telling me nice words as if nothing happened, inviting me over as we’re best friends. It’s too much and too soon. Please…let me breath !!!!!

Not worthy.

You make mistakes. You make them twice. You say some words. THE words. You say them twice. And what happens?? You get a kick in your ass. That’s what happens. But the third time…ohh, if it will be one, i’ll take soo much time. Because this isn’t fair and because this is still burning…I’ll kick your ass one day,too. Wait and see!!!!

Memories

 Don’t ask me what’s gotten into me tonight =))))

Simply amazing. I get chills down my spine :X I regret I wasn’t at his concert in Timisoara

But moving on…this really gets me nostalgic, sometimes in a good way…I miss being a kid again, all the snow, the joy, playing around being the only worrie…

I still love this movie, it’s my all-time favourite one!!! I watch it every year. There’s no Christmas without “Home Alone” and everytime I wish for myself that one day I’ll have my own home, a beautiful house and at Christmas time to have a wonderful Christmas three right next to a fireplace…carrols in the background, snowflakes on the window …and the house filled with people I love. It’s the image of a perfect Christmas.

An the next video is just hilarious )))) =)))))

September.

It’s been 2 years. Can you believe it? It feels like I know you forever.

Two years ago we talked for the 1st time. Two years ago I saw you for the 1st time.

That sparkle in your eyes…!

 

This for you. For the September days!!!

 

 

Ich wollt nur deine Stimme horen…

 

I know you’re out there. Far.

This is for you. De La Mine Pentru Tine. Dedicatie.

As mai zice multe, dar nu le vad rostul. Just…just, don’t forget to remember me!!!

Courage.

Atata lipsa de curaj si frica de nesiguranta.  De ce e greu sa o luam de la capat? De ce ne e frica de necunoscut?  De ce nu-mi pot face bagajele si sa plec? Nici nu conteaza unde. Pur si simplu sa plec. Sa vad lumea, sa cunosc oameni noi. Dar nu, prefer sa stau in camera mea, cu nasul in calculator ca poate el ma va invata ceva despre viata.  Sper doar sa vina odata si ziua aceea in care ma satur de tot si plec. Pentru ca vreau sa plec. M-am saturat sa stiu unele lucruri doar din auzite sau citite.

 

And we like it safe, don’t we?  We like to know that every morning the sun will shine and every night the moon guides us and the stars are always there at night. We like to have everything planned, we like to know that there are four seasons and that you have to dress up in winter ’cause it’s cold and that in summer you can go swimming…

What if..what if we wouldn’t know all these things? How would it change our lives?  Why don’t we trust our instincts anymore? We watch every evening the weather forecast and after that we think what to wear the next day…but instead, why not wait for the next morning to decide what clothes to put on?

All these “why”s are driving me insane.  why? why? why?

BECAUSE I WANT TO KNOW !!!!